Monday, September 3, 2012

Reflections of this Season

This may be a long post and will probably  be all over the place, but that's okay. Again, not sure who all reads this, but I'm writing more to clear my head.

In less than a week, I'll say goodbye to singleness and hello to married life. I'm so excited but if I'm honest, I have a few mixed emotions of saying adieu to singledom. Now, don't get me wrong- I'm grateful for this new season of my life, but my season of singleness was a rich one too.

I graduated high school thinking I would meet my husband in college- at the BCM of course! Um no! I met some great godly guys, and if I could combine different qualities into one guy, then I might would have found him. But my years at BCM really helped me to see what I was really looking for in a husband.

When I graduated college and then grad school still single- it stung. Badly! My timeline was all out of wack. I moved to a new city four hours away after grad school and thought for sure I'd meet him. Again no. Blind date after blind date- no.

It wasn't until I was 27 that the Lord really brought me to a place of true contentment in being single. I mean REAL TRUE CONTENTMENT. I prayed for it, and tried to fool myself into thinking I was content- I wasn't. I had put my life on hold until I found the one. I wasn't living. Truly living.

I'm not really sure exactly when the lightbulb came on that caused my shift in thinking, but it was somewhere around the fall of 2008 when i went to croatia. I suddenly embraced the freedom of being single. When I got the phone call about Croatia, I only had a few days to give an answer. It was liberating to be able to say yes, because I could- I didn't have to consult with anyone! same thing with going to Rwanda, Brazil and Haiti. i bought a house when I was single. I had incredible opportunities because I embraced where God had me right now. Not to say it wasn't easy- it was hard! All of my friends were getting married. Everyone but me.

I'm 31 and getting married. About 10 years behind my original schedule! But looking back, I wasn't ready. D wasn't ready. God wasn't through working in our lives so that we would be better together. I told him the other day that I was so thankful that we're older and getting married- he would not have wanted to marry me at 25! I wouldn't have wanted to marry me!

A verse that I clung to a lot during my single season is Psalm 84:5-7:
Blessed are those whose strength is in you,
whose hearts are set on pilgrimage.
6 As they pass through the Valley of Baka,
they make it a place of springs;
the autumn rains also cover it with pools.[a]
7 They go from strength to strength,
till each appears before God in Zion.

Our wedding verse is Psalm 126:3- The LORD has done great things for us and we are filled with joy.

Reflections of this Season
  • earned 2 college degrees
  • started my first real job
  • Landed my dream job in ministry
  • Moved away from home
  • Bought my first home
  • Traveled out of the country 4 times
  • Got a tattoo
  • Found a church home
  • found another church home
  • experienced community
  • experienced heartache but learned to see God in it
  • met the love of my life
  • found true friendships

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