Part of the Journey

Fourth of July is this weekend...I'm so excited for the chance to get away for a little while and just spend time with my family. This 4th July marks 4 years that I have been on my own in the real world. I moved 4th of July weekend. I remember how scared and excited I was. I was fresh out of grad school, ready to change the world. (Ha! social worker, remember?) I was moving away for the first time, but not just on my own, but 200 miles away! I knew no one, except for my old youth minister and his family, who live about 30 minutes away from me. I remember that weekend being so busy of trying to get everything unpacked, my pantry stocked, learning my way around town (thankfully, Walmart was right across the highway!). I remember when it came time for my parents to finally leave, my mom was fighting back the tears and we kept putting off saying goodbye. Finally, I was like, "Okay, just go. We're both a blubbery mess!" She cried and I cried. I had no idea what the next four years would teach me.

Moving away has been the best decision that I have ever made. I always said that I wanted to live on my own before I got married. I learned to be dependent on God for everything. I remember many nights, crying on the phone to my mom, because of how lonely I was. He sent me incredible friendships (including one random meeting at a Bible Study!- Sara!). He lead me to an incredible church family. I never realized how important your church family was until I moved. I remember when I joined the church I attend now, Pastor Bill said, "I know how hard this is for you. We want to be your family."

My job....my job. I moved here to work at a hospital. What a learning experience that was!! I learned so much...i had to be careful not to let my eyes pop out of my head. "Now you're 21 and this is baby number...4??" There were some days where I absolutley loved that job, then there were days where I hated it..with a passion. I remember sitting in my dear friend and 2nd mom, Sheryl's living room for bible study. I just cried about how miserable I was in my job and that I knew that God had called me here, called me to be a social worker, but how I didn't know what to do. We prayed. We cried. We prayed some more. It was so neat to see over a period of time how God just guided my every move to where I am now. I'm in my dream job. (well, most of the time it is...)

I look back over the past four years. I'm amazed at the person that I've become....my mom was telling me the other day that she couldn't believe some of the experiences that I've had and that I'm where I am today. Me neither. My God is so gracious, so merciful, so faithful. There were days when I wanted to throw my hands up and move back home. I remember one time actually thinking, "I want to move back home, at least I actually have friends there." I very quickly learned here who were my friends and who weren't, but I'm so thankful for the friends that I do have! Four years ago, I never would have thought that I would be where I am today. Now, granted part of that included that I thought that I would be married by now. but that' s okay.

This part of the journey has been long: winding roads, twists and turns, heartache, disappointment, uncertainity. The journey has also been beautiful: lessons of grace, hope, faithfulness, mercy, seeing God meet my every need, seeing Him break me down to mold me into who He wants me to be, learning to see that He is more than enough for me, that He truly satisfies.

I'm not sure what the next four years will look like, or even next week. But I know that wherever He leads me, I will go.